What is self-love? Is it a spa day? Retail therapy? Treating yourself? Eating to your heart’s desire? Or is it something else? Or is it all of this and more?
Human beings develop consciousness or awareness about themselves when they are 5 months old. And despite starting at a very young age, we still tend to feel very lost.
That doesn’t mean we don’t know what we want or need. If you ask anyone to name a list of things important to them, they will provide you a detailed one. But the only thing missing from the list would be their own name.
In this article, let us focus on What is Self-Love, why is it important and how can we achieve it!
So, what exactly is Self- love?
Self-love is a long journey, but it is a beautiful one once you decide to embark on it. Doing something that makes you happy on a daily basis is the greatest form of self-love.
In simplest terms, self-love means having high regards for your own well-being and happiness. For years it was compared with egotism or narcissism but now the perspective is changing. People are realizing that prioritizing about their self is not selfish, but self-love.
WHY IS SELF LOVE IMPORTANT?
Look around you. What do you see? Some might answer love, some might answer hate. But the truth is you see the reality, your reality. There is a famous quote which goes like this:
"How we judge others, is how we judge ourselves."
You might see gender battles, people bringing each other down on any and all platforms, victim-blaming, environmental havoc, and natural disasters all around you because let’s be honest, these are all happening in real-time and happening fast. However, there is a difference between what we see and what we perceive. What news we read and which one we wrap our fingers in getting tangled in the mess we create.
Self-love is important because it provides you a bubble. A rose-colored bubble that helps you feel safe and loved in a world that doesn’t look very safe and loving.
Self-love helps you perceive the positive things in life and remove the negative. It helps you fight your anxiety, your stress, or any other hidden insecurities. This doesn’t mean it leaves you dumb and oblivious to the world. It just makes you aware of the fact that the world is huge and ever-changing and even though it might seem overwhelming at times and that we might seem insignificant to make any change, the fact that we continue to love ourselves and spread love is more than enough.
In short, self-love is important because it results in the butterfly effect. What is that, you ask?
Butterfly Effect
According to the chaos theory, it has been said that something as small as the flutter of a butterfly’s wing can ultimately cause a typhoon halfway around the world.
It might seem destructive, but the metaphor it creates is beautiful.
Metaphorically it means that one small action or change can create a large impact down the road. One act of self-love can do wonders for your mental health. A mentally healthy person further spreads the love she/he gives herself/ himself to the world. And so on the word spreads.
Self-love not only helps you be at peace with yourself but also with the world. It fills you with consideration and compassion. The world becomes a better place because people become better at loving themselves. And once you destroy the hate within, you sow love wherever you go.
The main question still remains unanswered! How to practice self-love?
How to achieve self-love?
Stop the comparison
How many times a week do you hate yourself just because you admire someone else more. Admiration and respect are beautiful feelings. They don’t come easily.
So the next time you see someone with a certain body type you desire to have, a better house, happier love life, admire them for their hard work and efforts. And then when you walk back home, assure yourself that you will reach your destination at your own pace, and right now all you need to do is enjoy your journey and the little things. Just like they say, when you focus on the good, the good gets better.
Not all opinions are worthy
Everyone has opinions. It’s human nature. Some might be good, some might be bad. Some might be true, most would be false. And unlike everything else in the world, people give their opinions for free. All you can do is let them give it.
You see self-love is a bubble, a protective one. You are not here to teach people lessons, you have a lot on your own plate. Listen to your heart & your gut. Take all the advice you receive and act on the ones which make you happy.
Don’t be harsh on yourself
It’s ironic, you see. Humans who tend to suffer from perfectionism are the least happy with their work. Not only with their work but also with themselves. A perfectionist goes around giving their hundred percent to everything but themselves. ALLOW YOURSELF TO MAKE MISTAKES.
Process your fears
You might have your fears, your anxieties, depressions, etc. The sad news is they can be terrifying. But the good news is you are stronger than you realize. And if you still need help, therapy and counselling are here for you.
A major step in self-love is asking for help when needed. Don’t shy away from extending your hand, you will be surprised to know how many are ready to grab it and help you out.
Let go of toxicity
Yes, we did just say that don’t care about anyone’s opinions, but if you see someone draining out your energy on a daily basis, then keep your distance away from that person who has been toxic towards you. You are not anybody’s caretaker or an emotional punchbag. There is a difference between being there for your loved ones and being used by people you think love you.
Self-love is a long journey, but it is a beautiful one once you decide to embark on it. Doing something that makes you happy on a daily basis is the greatest form of self-love.
Remember! You are loved. You are wanted. You are enough. You are strong. You are smart. You are confident. You are beautiful. You are kind. You belong here. You make others smile. You are worthy of love. You are worthy of respect. You are full of gratitude. You are worthy of a great life. It is like the famous poet Nikita Gill once said,
"It took 3.8 billion years of triumphant evolution, remarkable collision, an unbelievable confluence made by sheer will and influence of this infinite universe and all of its stars to get you here.
I hope you never doubt again that even when you are in pain, you are a miracle, and every part of you is incredible."
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